Trailer Park Fortune Teller says Ravens will Stomp the Colts!
I was sitting home trying to think of a good story for the Ravens…when I had the idea, to find a fortune teller, to see who would win the upcoming playoff game between the Ravens and Colts. When I asked some of my Trailer park neighbors,”if they knew of any pyschic shops in Baltimore” they laughed at me.
Wes Pate, a lifelong resident in my Trailer park communtiy for over 30 years said”The best fortune teller in the World live 2 blocks away”. He told me her name was Sandra Guttlefin. She has been paying her ground rent for years, off of her Fortune Telling profits. Being ground rent is over $500 a month, I thought”She must have the locals hooked like a sea bass on her fortune predictions”.
So I bravely headed on over to her Trailer Home. Outside there was a sign that said Fortune Telling $25! I thought for $25, this lady better be the daughter of Notradamus lol! I knocked on her door, and a very old lady answered. I had the $25 in my hand. I told her I am a sports media writer….she said”Are You?”. Then I thought,” if she is a pyschic why did she ask me that?”
I told her I needed predictions for the Ravens vs Colts playoff game. I had to sit in front of a crystal ball for crying out loud! This lady was so old, I was looking for dust to fall off of her. The place smelled like cats, probally because there were like 5 cats in the Trailer. It was finally prediction time!
“The Ravens will win 24 to 7 ” she said. When I asked her”How accurate are your predictions” she replied”if there wrong, I will give you, your money back”. Apparently I learned Peyton Manning will be sacked at least 4 times, and he will throw 3 interceptions in this game. So Colt fans, your better off not even watching the game…..Losers!
I am a believer of this senior citizen fortune teller! The Ravens will stomp the Colts and Peyton Manning into the fake grass at there dumpy dome stadium lol! It will be more relaxing this week watching the game, after all….I know my Ravens will win 24-7!!
Written by: Tim Lumber
Wes Pate, a lifelong resident in my Trailer park communtiy for over 30 years said”The best fortune teller in the World live 2 blocks away”. He told me her name was Sandra Guttlefin. She has been paying her ground rent for years, off of her Fortune Telling profits. Being ground rent is over $500 a month, I thought”She must have the locals hooked like a sea bass on her fortune predictions”.
So I bravely headed on over to her Trailer Home. Outside there was a sign that said Fortune Telling $25! I thought for $25, this lady better be the daughter of Notradamus lol! I knocked on her door, and a very old lady answered. I had the $25 in my hand. I told her I am a sports media writer….she said”Are You?”. Then I thought,” if she is a pyschic why did she ask me that?”
I told her I needed predictions for the Ravens vs Colts playoff game. I had to sit in front of a crystal ball for crying out loud! This lady was so old, I was looking for dust to fall off of her. The place smelled like cats, probally because there were like 5 cats in the Trailer. It was finally prediction time!
“The Ravens will win 24 to 7 ” she said. When I asked her”How accurate are your predictions” she replied”if there wrong, I will give you, your money back”. Apparently I learned Peyton Manning will be sacked at least 4 times, and he will throw 3 interceptions in this game. So Colt fans, your better off not even watching the game…..Losers!
I am a believer of this senior citizen fortune teller! The Ravens will stomp the Colts and Peyton Manning into the fake grass at there dumpy dome stadium lol! It will be more relaxing this week watching the game, after all….I know my Ravens will win 24-7!!
Written by: Tim Lumber
posted by Tim Lumber at
11:35 PM
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